i've been listening to this song endlessly for several days now: a cover of the Beatles' Across the Universe, sung by Rufus Wainwright. (that's a link to the mp3--go download it.)

it's just beautiful. and listening to it for the umpteenth time in the car tonight on my way back to work for a staff meeting, it struck me what a good day it was to be listening to this song. what with the 'high level' terror alerts going on and all. i've been thinking all along that this was a sort of sad song--the repetitive 'nothing's gonna change my world'--from my own perspective seemed very closed-off, something like, well, someone like me would say. tonight it suddenly seemed a peaceful phrase: nothing's gonna change my world. fantastical maybe, but a nice thought.

and, that one completely unintelligible (but you have to admit, still beautiful, i just love his voice) lyric is 'jai guru deva om.' which of course i had to look up, and found a bunch of different explanations. it seems that it translates to something like, 'thanks to the heavenly teacher,' or 'victory to the teacher,' or 'praise to my godlike master.' i've read all of those in various places. the 'om' part is...well, om. it's chanted before and at the end of a lot of Hindu things. it's the sound of the natural vibration of the universe. that much i knew.

it's funny really if you think of how high the Beatles must have been when they came up with that one. (you know, they went through that whole trippin Maharishi phase and all...actually i read one thing too about how the Maharishi's teacher's name was Guru Dev, and apparently our boy John L. added the 'a' on the end for songwriting purposes). but still. a nice song.

kristi rocks. she sent me the best e-card ever...





also see picture up on top of the page there.

ok just one more...check me out in the 2nd-to-last picture on the bottom of this page.

is it wrong that i want hair like that right now, 7 years later?

even more frightening!

a story i did (and modeled for) about thrift store shopping.

i still have the black skirt (still one of my favorites), green shirt, polyesterish blue overcoat, and of course the fabulous, famous ireland tshirt.

but man. i know i wasn't thin ever, but i was definitely thinner back then. bah.

oh my god...the t@p help wanted page. check out the picture at the bottom. hah!

and tell it to t@pHead. my very own advice column. i remember cracking myself up while writing these...ah, memories.

and then i get even more nostalgiac and remember the wayback machine, where some portion of t@p is archived. and i remember this kid named corey who wrote stuff for me...well, for t@p. he was a kid, and a remarkable writer. i found some of his stories. wish i knew where he was now. it would be interesting to know.

i was feeling nostalgiac for some reason, so i put "t@p online" into yahoo. it came up with 386 results, looks like the majority of which are actually about t@p. i guess i worked for a site that was actually....something. neat.

i've been 30 years old for 12 hours now.

so far, i don't much like it.